How to create a culture of support that helps your employees in their journey to parenthood

The path to parenthood isn't always an easy one. One in four pregnancies ends in miscarriage. For some, a biological pregnancy isn't possible and other avenues have to be explored, such as adoption or surrogacy. Sometimes everything can be going like clockwork until the unexpected happens.  

It can be heartbreaking. 

For employers, you might not know when an employee is struggling with their journey to parenthood as many will not feel comfortable sharing that detail in the workplace.  

However, you can create a culture that helps foster a sense of support and safety in your workplace. You can help employees feel comfortable sharing their struggles – you can help them not fear the 'motherhood penalty', or fuel their fear of missing opportunities due to their desire to take long parental leave. 

It may not be immediate, but by showing your employees (parents or not) that they are supported, and that they're not going to be treated unfairly or unfavourably, you can set a tone that helps support parents in your business who may be struggling. And that's going to have a knock-on effect for all the staff in your business. Because a culture of a support is about everyone.  

Strategies for providing a culture of support  

Create a policy supporting employees undergoing fertility treatments and experiencing loss – this could cover additional leave, right to flexible working hours, etc. Explore ways to make this information accessible to those who do not wish to disclose the reasons for their application. 

Provide flexibility to attend medical appointments – particularly those that may need to be attended at short notice (e.g. fertility treatments). And offer the choice to work from home or take time off if feeling unwell or on pregnancy test result days.  

Boost awareness on how the organisation supports employees through their family journey, and how to support colleagues. Be aware that leaders who support others might also be going through their own hidden journey and they may need assistance too. 

Educate leaders and employees on how to support colleagues undergoing fertility treatment or an adoption process. Strong relationships and open conversations with leaders are the key to workers feeling supported at this time.  You can prepare yourself by watching the simulations in the manager section to prepare yourself for tricky conversations.  

Ensure policies are inclusive for all types of families and circumstances. Cover adoption, surrogacy and the needs of employees who choose to act as a surrogate (although workplace legislation does not specifically cover surrogacy, an organisation cannot request the employee to return earlier than six weeks from the date of birth), even when the surrogate no longer has the responsibility of care for the child.  

Recognise that every journey is unique and the support required for each person will look different. Relationship stress can increase during these experiences, leaving individuals even more psychologically vulnerable.  

Set up good practices and actively promote the supports that are available. The journey to parenthood can be intensely personal and private, and many people will not wish to disclose their situation to their employer.  

If possible, create visible role models to help employees feel confident of the support they can expect. Encourage people to share their stories.  

Offer access to counselling or an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) if you can. Promote available support programs and remind employees they can see their GP for a mental health care plan if needed.  If applicable, ask your service provider to facilitate a workshop on fertility and loss for all employees to raise awareness. You can start by sharing our factsheet on perinatal mental health.  

Be mindful that, for some employees, their journey will end without the result they hoped for. Be sensitive to their changing circumstances and encourage them to access the support they need.